If you have been reading my blog, you briefly know about this retarded man I have let into my life and unfortunately now I can't get him out. I hate the term "baby's daddy" but I guess that's what he is. For the sake of this blog I will address him as "Thorne". So Thorne came over last night to visit his son. He claims I'm spoiling him but our son is only a month old (or he will be tomorrow) and seeing that I spend every day and night with him does he not expect that attachment to be there? That's besides the point, I found myself staring at Thorne and just feeling nothing but disappointment as I reflect over our current circumstances. I'm struggling to hold it together - I don't get a break from my new role as a mother and I've given up everything just to make the best choice for my baby's future. No drinking, no smoking, no recreational drugs while this dumbass get to play family man when he visits then goes back to do all that he wants with another girl in his bed. As I said before, I know I'm partly to blame for my situation but I'm trying to make things easier for him by being understanding and just telling him we'll take things day by day. Why the fuck should I be considerate of him? I'm the one on the hard side of this situation. I'm the one taking care of your child day and night while you're galvanting on.
These are the things that drive girls to that crazy state of mind. I always heard stories about from my guy friends about their own "baby's mama drama". I wondered why these girls were so crazy.... what brought them to this point to where they would go overboard? Why create this demented persona of yourself? Although some might already be wacky, others have the "asshole by nature" boyfriend to thank for their antics. Fellas, girls live off of emotion and if you break them down you will find yourself strattling that thin line between love and hate.